It's almost like they expected the guys dispensing "medical" marijuana to be Boy Scouts

Sometimes I just scratch my head in wonderment at the credulity of our news media. Today's Sunday Star-Ledger, page one above the fold: Vetting of proposed N.J. pot dispensary seems hazy.

It took them 3,000+ words, but the bottom line is this — the guys signing up to dispense "medical" marijuana aren't Boy Scouts.

No shit Sherlock.

The "grower?" He got his "degree" from The Cannabis College of Amsterdam, a joke online "school."

"Remember, it's just for fun!" Get a 90 or better on the 20-question quiz, which even asks how long it takes to get high off of "space cakes," and you can print your very own "Diploma of Higher Education." Don't pass the first time? No worries, just hit reload and try again.

OK, so maybe you don't really need to be a certified horticulturalist to grow pot. But you'd think the medical advisory board would be on the up and up, right?

Wrong!

Only one small problem. Tiny really. Nobody is "authorized to prescribe medical marijuana" yet. Dr. Martirosov is jumping the gun! But he did garner himself a catchy web site name. Could be useful, if he ever gets his pot dispensary off the ground.

There's another problem though, Dr. Martirosov is being sued by Allstate for insurance fraud. I know, it's hard to believe, a guy looking to sell dope skates along the edge of the law. The lawsuit "alleges a sophisticated medical billing scheme that involved runners, or individuals paid to bring in patients, and a tangled web of medical corporations engaging in fraud."

But wait, there's more! The dudes financing "medical" marijuana aren't known for their fiduciary fortitude.

[T]wo directors went bankrupt [and] the foundation is linked to a training school for marijuana growers recently suspended in Colorado.

Yeah, about that Colorado connection, state officials suspended their operations when it was discovered all the principals involved had extensive criminal records.

Again, hard to believe, right? Criminals involved in the marijuana trade!

I mean, a child could have seen this coming. Yet the Star-Ledger acts like it's a news flash. They're shocked, Shocked!, to find that the people dispensing "medical" marijuana aren't upstanding medical professionals dedicated to upholding the Hippocratic Oath. Just like the illegal dope trade, the supposedly legit pot growers are a bunch of two-bit hustlers and shady characters with dubious connections.

It's time to end the charade. "Medical" marijuana is a joke. It's a scam perpetrated by aging stoners who are too lazy to keep driving into Newark or Irvington to score some lids. They're counting on a doctor's note to keep them in weed without the risk of getting ripped off by some street punk. They'll trade a scumbag on the corner for a lowlife behind a counter, and laugh all the way to 7-11 for more Oreos.

We have two choices. Keep marijuana illegal, or end the farce and just sell pot to anyone and everyone. Put it in CVS, behind the counter with the Marlboro Lights and Playboy magazines. Tax the hell out of it and stop pretending pot has any medicinal value. It's a recreational drug like nicotine or alcohol and adults ought to be able to handle it responsibly.

Those that can't? Well, they'll keep the Doritos man busy restocking his shelves. At least until Mom kicks them out of the basement.

Posted at 21:53 by Chris Wysocki   [/nj_politics]   Comments | Perm Link |
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