To almost no one's surprise, the Jets fired Rex Ryan and John Idzik this morning

From my perspective, they should've fired Woody Johnson too.

Bye bye Rex.

At least this time Johnson hired a football expert to find him a new coach and GM.

Because that executive search firm thing worked out so well last time. Face it, Idzik was a disaster from the get-go. He essentially set Ryan up to fail. Geno Smith is not a franchise quarterback. Letting Darrell Revis and Antonio Cromartie go was a colossal mistake. Not giving long-term deals to standouts like Wilkerson and Richardson sowed dissent inside the locker room.

The question now is, who's dumb enough to take the job? The Jets are dysfunctional, the owner is an idiot, and they really need talent.

Sad to say, but Rex Ryan was their best option, mostly because he's the devil we know. And when it comes to experienced head coaches who might want the nod, let's just say the pickings are slim.

Jim Harbaugh has 48 million reasons for going to Michigan.

Bill Cowher already told Woody to get stuffed once, he's not going to put his hat in the ring. Jon Gruden? There's a reason he's in the booth. Ditto for Tony Dungy, although he does have the quarterback development pedigree in Peyton Manning.

Sports Illustrated lists a bunch of second-tier options.

Possible replacements: Josh McDaniels, Adam Gase, Dan Quinn, Darrell Bevell, Hue Jackson, Kyle Shanahan, Jack Del Rio. There is no shortage of options, both those somewhat tested (McDaniels, Del Rio) and those set for a first head coaching shot. McDaniels, Gase, Jackson, Shanahan and Bevell all would represent a shift away from the defensive-minded Ryan.

Yawn.

That leaves, Jersey guy Greg Schiano? Puh-lease.

There was an episode of Phineas and Ferb where the boys invent a time machine and go into the future where they meet their kids, who naturally look and act just like them. What's the first thing Phineas says? "How are the Jets doing this year?"

The answer? "They stink."

Sigh.

Posted at 10:28 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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New York Jets fans don't get no Facebook respect

Sigh.

I am a Jets fan!

And I'm proud to be a Jets fan!

So there!

My daughter is a Jets fan too!

I even have a friend who's a Jets fan! Really!

Then there's this guy:

And not for nothing, but the Jets are sold out. Every game.

Unlike say, the Bills.

So c'mon Jets fans. Get those Facebook "Likes" in gear. Show that other team how Met Life Stadium is our stadium too. No matter what some silly map says.

Now, repeat after me:

J - E - T - S, Jets! Jets! Jets!

Posted at 09:10 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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David Garrard "retires" from the Jets, paving the way for Mark Sanchez to keep his job

One of Sophie's friends is a big Jets fan like me. She loves to talk football, I guess because she has something like 17 brothers. Anyway, last week she was over the house and she said to me that David Garrard was the odd man out in the Jets' QB rotation. Why? Geno Smith, that's why. Always go with the younger guy.

Girl's got ESP or something, because today David Garrard announced his "retirement."

Translation: The Jets have been shopping Sanchez around but nobody wants his bloated contract, and the salary cap hit from releasing him would be too much for the team to bear. So since they're stuck with Mark Sanchez, they'd better use Mark Sanchez. Drafting Geno Smith made Garrard superfluous. Simple as that.

The stars have now aligned for Mark Sanchez. Matt Simms will head back to the practice squad. Greg McElroy will once again warm the bench on clipboard duty. And Geno Smith will be the designated #2 behind Sanchez so folks will gobble up his jerseys in the hope Rex will put him in after the bye week.

Nothing else makes sense from a business perspective.

4 and 12 here we come.

Posted at 09:05 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Sunday Night Football fans, are you ready for some Carrie Underwood?

I don't know about you, but I'm already waiting all day for Sunday Night. Football, that is. Because now we're assured NBC will continue their tradition of Hot Blond Country Stars Belting Out The SNF Theme Song with the announcement that Carrie Underwood is taking over for the lovely and talented Faith Hill.

Eat your heart out Tony Romo. Because Mike Fisher is one lucky dude.

And since this is National Offend A Feminist Week, why not make some Womyn's Studies Majors' heads assplode by displaying a few pictures which demonstrate conclusively that beauty and talent need not be mutually exclusive.

Oh yeah, I am definitely ready for some football!

Posted at 11:58 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Darrelle Revis gets voted off the island by the Jets

When the Jets first drafted star cornerback Darrelle Revis NYC Mayor Mike Bloomberg dubbed Manhatan "Revis Island." That was then. This is now — the Jets voted Revis off his island in a trade with Tampa Bay.

Truthfully Revis has always been a thorn in the Jets' side. When he's good, he's very good. But he's prone to holdouts and injuries and the idea of "waiting" or "hoping" he'll step up this season really isn't that appealing. Not with the team obviously rebuilding this year. They're already released or traded so many of their starters I had one friend snark at my Jets t-shirt: erase the "J" and "S" 'cause they got traded too.

Ha ha. Real funny. We're still stuck with Mark Sanchez. And Tim Tebow. Thank God for NFL Sunday Ticket. I can watch the Niners while the Jets go 4 and 12.

Posted at 17:51 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Surely a sign of the Apocalypse: Woman kicker trying out at the NFL Combine

Sunday afternoon Lauren Silberman will make NFL history. She'll be the first woman to ever participate in an NFL Regional Scouting Combine.

And of course she's doing it right here in New Jersey, at the Jets' practice facility in Florham Park.

She's at least played some football right? Maybe in the LFL? Nope. Not one game. Her claim to fame is a fan event where she connected on a field goal. From that humble beginning, dreams are made.

Dreams of Title IX for the NFL, that is.

On the other hand, more than a few of the guys will be dreaming along the lines of "I'd hit that."

I imagine they'll be lining up to get flagged 15 yards for roughing the kicker too.

Speaking of penalties, she won't have to worry too much about illegal hands to the face, IYKWIMAITYD.

With no actual experience she's got zero chance of moving up to the Super Regionals in Dallas next month.

And since Regional Combines for specialists are limited to 40 kickers and 50 punters, Silberman's little stunt means there's a potentially deserving college kicker sitting on his couch while she scores points for the Ya-Ya Sisterhood.

That's what feminists call "equality."

UPDATE 04 Mar 2013 12:21:
And the results are in....

Epic Fail.

She wants a second chance. Because she was "injured." Maybe she pulled her vagina?

Rumors that the Jets had slapped a Franchise Tag on Silberman could not be confirmed at this time.

Posted at 11:25 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Rex Ryan benches Mark Sanchez. Again. A week late. Same Old Jets.

Oh sure, now that it doesn't matter, Rex Ryan pulls the plug on Fumbles Interceptez.

Greg McElroy is now the Jets' starting QB. For two meaningless weeks.

Tim Tebow? He's out in the cold, wondering where his career went.

It's time to bench Rex Ryan. And GM Mike Tannenbaum. Signing Fumbles to that outlandish contract extension ($8.25 million guaranteed next season) was undoubtedly the dumbest move ever made by a team that invented the dumb move.

Is Greg McElroy our guy? Who the hell knows! But he's Not Mark Sanchez, and that's what the Jets need right now. Actually it's what the Jets needed on Monday night, when he just might have done what a quarterback is supposed to do — throw the ball to his own guys, and hang on to those snaps from center.

As for Fumbles' guaranteed millions? They should cut him from the team and have Woody Johnson pay him out of his own pocket. To earn his keep put Sanchez to work parking cars. Of course, he'd probably screw that up too.

Posted at 22:18 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Obamabot Eva Longoria dumped Jets QB Mark Sanchez hours before Sunday's loss to the Patriots

Maybe he's voting for Romney. Or maybe she's a Pats fan. But whatever the reason, Eva Longoria dumped Mark Sanchez on Sunday, to concentrate on her relationsship with Barack Obama.

She dumped you for an older man Mark. A guy who makes promises he can't keep, and who's wooing millions of other women to boot. You can do better than a floozy like that!

What kind of "girlfriend" dumps her guy hours before a big game? She couldn't wait until Monday? I guess he wanted her to be there for him, and she said "no." Mark's GQ charm was no match for Dear Leader's dedication to protecting her lady parts. He whispered "I'll tax the rich!" and she swooned.

At least now we know why Sanchez fumbled in overtime. He was missing his gal.

You can do better Mark. She was too old for you anyway. Hang with Tebow. He'll introduce you to some girls with class. The kind of girl you can proudly take home to mama.

And in the meantime, concentrate on beating the Fish, OK?

Posted at 12:30 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Sunday night quarterbacking, and other random stuff

My friend Mike gave me two tickets to Saturday's Jets - Giants game. Sophie said, "Take me! Take me!" How could I say "no"?

We hopped the #71 bus to Newark Penn Station at 4 PM. The NJ Transit web site said it was the best option. What it didn't say was, #71 goes all over Hell's three acres. And back. I think there was a stop in Pennsylvania. Or maybe it was Delaware. It was hard to tell. But at 5:30 we finally pulled onto Raymond Blvd and into the Penn Station bus lanes.

Whew.

From there it was smooth sailing. As soon as we got off the bus two kids saw our Jets jerseys and started the J-E-T-S, Jets, Jets, Jets chant. We high-fived 'em and made a beeline for the ticket window. The clerk was a Jets fan! He got us set up with train tickets lickedity split. Well, ticket. Turns out kids under 12 are free on weekends.

Thanks NJ Transit!

Hop the train on track 1, get off in Secaucus, and switch to another train for the short hop to the stadium. I must say, the NJ Transit station in Secaucus is amazing. Helpful staff. Clean. Big, bright signage. Did I mention the helpful staff? We're strolling along and a woman says "you better hurry, the train is leaving in one minute". It helps to wear a Jets jersey! Sophie started running and I huffed and puffed to keep up.

We made the train. What fun! There were Jets fans everywhere, all pumped up for the game. Everyone had beer! That's what I call traveling in style.

The game kinda sucked though. Same old Jets. Sophie had a good time though, hanging with Dad and eating her way through the game. $8.50 for a hot dog? But she proclaimed it the Best Hotdog Ever so who am I to argue?

Mom picked us up after she got off work (Yea Mom!) and we stopped for quick bite at Jose Tejas on the way home.

Sophie slept until noon.

And the paper confirmed what anyone with brains could see during the game, Wayne Hunter is not up to the job at right tackle. Dude, eat some freakin' Wheaties! Tammy thinks it's because he cut his hair, he's not scary anymore. Maybe. Sanchez is dead meat if Hunter can't block and right now everybody knowns that Wayne Hunter can't block his grandmother. If I was the coach I'd put Wilkerson into that spot because they need a big guy to stop the pass rush. Any learning curve on his part can't be as bad Hunter repeating the same mistakes he made last year.

Dude's gotta know he can't phone it in, guaranteed contract or no guaranteed contract. Or this time next year he's coaching high school football in Idaho.

In other news, today was yard work day. Thrilling, I know. Yet, necessary.

The weeds are winning. I'm pretty sure they know that.

Why is it that the deer eat my tomatoes and my flowers and my shrubs but not one single stinkin' weed? Are they in cahoots with the weeds? Is it some kind of conspiracy? I have a hunch they're out to make me crazy.

It's not as hard as you might think.

Posted at 23:35 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Replacement Refs? Yeah, that'll be good for the NFL

Did Roger Goodell learn nothing from last season's lockout? Replacement refs? Seriously?

On the one hand, where do I sign up? Because I could so do that job!

I reffed a flag football game once; that's gotta count as "experience," right? And I can yell at the TV better than anyone so I'd be ideal for the replay booth too. C'mon commish, I'm waitin' by the phone…

OK, on a more serious note, the zebras do work their butts off and it seems silly to shortchange them. That said though, there's no indication from the article of what the impasse is about, so it's hard to say which side needs to budge. But it's crazy to try and run an NFL season with anything less than the professional referees we've come to know and hate love.

Figure it out guys. Or don't complain when a blind blogger from New Jersey muffs what (to you) should have been an obvious call.

Any resemblance between that commercial and my pending NFL officiating debut is purely coincidental. Honest.

Posted at 21:13 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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The Jets trade for Tim Tebow

Confused, I am. Why did the Jets give Mark Sanchez a $40.5 million dollar contract extension and then turn around and sign Tim Tebow?

Because he came cheap? The former first round draft pick went for a 4th and 6th round pick, and Denver had to throw in a coupla cases of Coors Light to sweeten the deal.

The Jets say Tebow will fit into their plans for expanded use of the Wildcat offense. Um, ok. They still need somebody to catch the ball. Don't they? Am I missing something?

Maybe the Jets are hoping for some Divine Intercession or something. I did hear that they've changed their fan chant to "J - E - T - S, Jesus!, Jesus!, Jesus!"

UPDATE 21 Mar 2012 21:08:
Not so fast, there's a poison pill in Tebow's contract.

Any team that trades for Tebow must reportedly pay the Broncos about $5 million in advanced salaries from 2012-14, a significant sum for a quarterback that is not a starter.

Boy oh boy, this deal just keeps getting better and better doesn't it?

Or the Jets could nullify the trade. Reportedly the Rams and Jags are "interested." Stay tuned...

UPDATE 21 Mar 2012 22:13:
Done deal!

Denver agreed to a $2.5 million giveback, essentially paying the Jets to take Tebow off their hands.

And with that, the Jets now have 4 quarterbacks on the roster. If I was Greg McElroy I wouldn't get too comfortable in Florham Park.

Posted at 14:27 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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The Jets punt on Peyton Manning, and give Mark Sanchez a big new contract

Quarterback controversy? What quarterback controversy?

Finally, Gang Green gets one right! Peyton was never gonna play in the same stadium as his little brother, no matter how much money Woody Johnson dangled in front of him.

So, how about a little flight crew love for Mark?

Hopefully they freed up enough cap space to go out and get some guys who can (a) tackle and (b) block. Last season's woes weren't entirely the fault of Santonio Holmes you know; the offensive line was weak and Sanchez often had no time in the pocket. Eat some Wheaties™ fellas! And tackling from behind is no way to win football games. Maybe the coaches could work on that during the off-season.

Meanwhile Peyton is visiting Denver (so much for Tebow-mania, eh?) and he'll flirt with Kansas City before heading back to Miami to talk to the Fish.

The Redskins are out of the hunt, but Arizona is still a possibility.

But I think Denver is where he'll end up.

And then we can all speculate about Tim Tebow's future. Because what else is there to do before pre-season starts?

J! E! T! S! Jets! Jets! Jets!

Posted at 10:50 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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The Jets #Fail: an inglorious end to an inglorious season

OK Giants fans, you can stop texting me now. I get it. Your team won. You've got playoff tickets. I've got a front-row seat on the couch next to my remote control. Now call me when you beat a team that isn't dysfunctional or quarterbacked by a cripple.

Yeah, that was a cheap shot. So sue me.

As for the Jets? It's said there's no "I" in Team. There ain't no Santonio Holmes neither.

That's always been the Jets' problem. Prima donnas. They attract 'em like white on rice, and let 'em run wild. For all his bravado, if Rex Ryan can't control his own locker room, how in the hell can he expect to reach the Super Bowl?

Oh well, there's always next season.

Posted at 11:51 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Did the Jets just shoot themselves in the foot?

The New York Jets signed free agent felon wide receiver Plaxico Burress to a one year deal.

Insert "shoot yourself in the foot" jokes here.

F'rinstance:

If HBO reruns Hard Knocks who will play Burress, Adam Sandler or Burt Reynolds? The episode where he's signed can be titled "The Longest Foot."

Or,

Will Burress be the go-to guy whenever Schotty orders up the shotgun?

"Schotty," "shotgun…" Sometimes I crack myself up.

UPDATE 01 Aug 2011 10:37:
Linked by Theo Spark. Thanks!

Posted at 12:51 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Yes, I am ready for some football!

Our long national nightmare is over. No, not the one begat at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue by that Obama fellow; the other one.

The NFL lockout ended today.

Sundays in the fall can now proceed as God and Man intended.

It took 4½ months for the Grand Poobahs of Football to carve up a $9.3 billion dollar pie in a manner which the billionaire owners and the millionaire players deemed "fair."

So naturally the question people will ask is, "who won?"

That's easy. The lawyers won. They always do.

But I'm still ready for some football.

J! E! T! S! Jets! Jets! Jets!

Posted at 16:52 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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How about a Christie - Ryan ticket?

A Super Bowl ticket, that is.

Oh, you thought I was talking about 2012 and Rep. Paul Ryan? No, that would be a pretty cool combo too, but right now Governor Awesome is happily singing the praises of another famous Ryan — Rex Ryan, Head Coach of "New Jersey's Jets!"

From the press release:

During a press conference in Newark on Tuesday Governor Christie said that although Rex Ryan was not born in New Jersey, there are few people who are more like New Jersey in so many ways. A Jets fan, the Governor said he hopes Rex Ryan takes "New Jersey's Jets" to the Super Bowl.

An Honorary New Jerseyan! That's better than Veep any old day.

J-E-T-S! Jets! Jets! Jets!

Posted at 10:17 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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And the Jets kick some serious New England butt!

It'll be Jets - Steelers for the AFC Championship Game, just like I predicted. Tom Brady and Bill Belichick can only get to Dallas if they buy a ticket. I hope your couch is comfy fellas; you'll be spending a lot of time on it.

Hey Ed, how 'bout them Pats?

<grin>

J - E - T - S! Jets! Jets! Jets!

Final score, Jets 28, Pats 21.

The Jets defense flummoxed Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, sacking him five times and intercepting Brady for the first time since Week 6. And the offense made plays when needed, led by Mark Sanchez efficiently throwing for three scores (and no interceptions) and the running combination of Shonn Greene and LaDainian Tomlinson eclipsing four yards per carry.

The Jets Flight Crew is here to help me celebrate.

Oh yeah, we are definitely gonna celebrate!

Watch out Big Ben, you're next!

Posted at 20:25 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Brett Favre fined $50K for "not cooperating" with Jenn Sterger

The NFL has thoroughly examined Jenn Sterger and her allegations of inappropriate sextual advances on the part of Brett Favre. And really, who wouldn't want to thoroughly examine Jenn Sterger?

Ms. Sterger, a former NY Jets game hostess, alleged that the future Hall of Fame quarterback sent her explicit text messages and photos, including a picture of a penis, during and after his tenure with the Jets.

But it wasn't until Favre left the Jets for Minnesota that Sterger's story got legs. The league immediately opened an investigation, which finally concluded today.

Brett Favre will be fined $50,000, not for any alleged misconduct, but for failing to "cooperate" with the NFL's investigation.

In the end they couldn't prove Favre sent the photos, or that the photos in question were even of his manly bits.

So they got him on a "Martha Stewart" — a trumped up charge of (maybe) not fully telling the truth.

Meanwhile Ms. Sterger has continued exploiting her 15 minutes of fame, first with a risque Maxim photo shoot, and then by leaving nothing to the imagination for Playboy.

I guess a Jenn Sterger Sex Tape is not far behind. Not that I have any direct knowledge of a Jenn Sterger Sex Tape, no not me. I've never seen a Jenn Sterger Sex Tape. If there were indeed a Jenn Sterger Sex Tape I don't think I'd actually get a copy, let alone show it to you guys.

But on the off chance that some teenage perv is Googling away in search of a mythical Jenn Sterger Sex Tape I'm not above lusting after the hits.

Yeah, I'm craven like that.

And my buddy Donald Douglas is trying to get a Rule 5 linkaround revved up over at his place. So enjoy these photos of the lovely Jenn Sterger.

You're welcome.

Posted at 15:00 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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Jets - Ravens, Mark Sanchez brought a knife to a gun fight

Watching last night's MNF home opener for the Jets was painful.

What's up with all the razzle-dazzle at the line of scrimmage? Who does Schotty think he's fooling with that crap? His offensive line? I lost count of the false start penalties.

The Jets' offense vs Baltimore's defense reminded me of the scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark when Indiana Jones shoots the guy waving a big knife.

Mark Sanchez is the guy with the knife.

The Ravens, and now every other NFL defense who plays the Jets, is Indiana Jones.

The fans? We're the ones saying, "Oh, what the fuck now?"

Posted at 09:49 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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The obligatory Ines Sainz vs the New York Jets post

They said. She said. He said. She said. Never mind!

I thought all along this incident was much ado about nothing. Sometimes guys and gals just goof around. It's not sexual harassment. At most it's harmless flirtation; the kind of thing that happens when hot sexy girls mingle with warm-blooded athletic men.

Nobody ever said that football players had to be monks. And there is zero chance that anyone will confuse Ines Sainz with a nun. She's got it goin' on, and she flaunts her assets at every opportunity.

Sure Ms. Sainz is a serious sports reporter. She spends 3 hours preparing for every game. Five minutes to study the stats, and 2 hours and 55 minutes to pack her booty into those skin-tight jeans.

That picture on the left, it's the actual outfit she wore at the Jets practice facility.

Yowza.

All work and no play makes Ines a boring girl. Ines Sainz is not boring!

J-E-T-S Jets! Jets! Jets!

Posted at 21:42 by Chris Wysocki   [/jets]   Comments | Perm Link |
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